I Could Tell You... But I'd Have To Kill You

It's such a cliche. This line, people use it thinking they're clever, when really it makes me want to vomit just for something interresting to use. "Hey, what did you do over the weekend?" "I could tell you... but I'd have to kill you!" Oh my God, shoot me now.

This is the perfect phrase however to describe my life in Korea. To say that people ruling my life are secretive about the details of my existence here would be at the very least... accurate. For instance, I am going to a week-long new teacher orientation this week. It's a new teacher orientation, even though I've been here one year. I'm looking at it as one week away from teaching. This is all I know about the trip. I know that it is in another city. Which city??? Who knows. I know that it is one week long, and that after 4th period today Mr. Yoo will put me on a train. What about after the train? Where am I going? What will I be doing there? I know I'm staying overnight, what will the accomodations be like? What about food? Will there be internet access? Why am I here? What happened to my brain, why can't I think in complicated sentences anymore? Why is there one mosquito in my apartment that just feasts on me all night? What's the deal with kim-chi? So many questions... not a single answer.

So, here I sit. Monday morning. I have a packed suitcase, a bit of cash, and blind faith that everything will work out, more than likely in the most comical and farcical way possible. These Koreans keep the Americans in the dark like it's a matter of national security. If no one hears from me by friday then call the state department... I've been put in a Korean internment camp.

P.S. - on another subject, I got my first phone bill today, calling home is very cheap. Nothing to fear from the big bill yet to come.