On The Old Campaign Trail

Okay, it's that time of year again. Anseong will be choosing a new mayor in a couple of weeks. Now is the time for the candidates, Mr. Smiley and Mr. Reminds Me Of Ho Chi Minh, to be out there kissing babies and shaking hands. You would not believe what passes now a days for campaigning in South Korea.

Now, I have met the candidates. Yes, I'm in the center of the mayoral whirlwind in Anseong. I met one candidate at a restaurant, he was handing out buisness cards with his picture on it. This was, of course, Mr. Smiley. He seemed nice enough, and his pictures plastered all over billboards. You can also see his picture on the side of trucks, blaring loudspeaker messages saying things in Korean that I'm certain translate to "it's 7a.m. on sunday and Americans do not get to sleep in at all."

Now, if you want to see heated exchange and mudslinging, there is only one place to go. You must go downtown to the main intersection. There, several streets come together and there are various islands/medians at this intersection. Now, on island one you see about 10 young women in red t-shirts, Mr. Smiley's girls, doing their modified Macarena dance to some bad Korean techno. On island two you see about 10 young women in teal t-shirts, Mr. Reminds Me Of Ho Chi Minh's girls, doing their modified Macarena dance to some bad Korean techno. Wow, you could cut the tension with a spoon, it was palpable. So much animosity, so much hatred, so much mudslinging... represented by dueling Macarena dancers. Oh the humanity!!!

When will politicians learn that at the end of the day you still have to like yourself? This is worse than the fight in the U.S. over hanging chads, worse than the gun boat veterans. I simply don't know how these guys sleep at night. Oh the horror of the campaign. Those singing, Macarenaing girls will haunt me until I die.

Go Mr. Smiley!!